Dear Mr President.
I am extremely sorry about the accident yesterday. I can assure you, it was NOT my fault. Let me explain.
I was gliding gracefully through town when i saw a grumpy businessman that had this weird suitcase and a bagel… A BAGEL! I could not resist so I swooped down and tried to grab a bite and he smacked me away. I fell into his case which was sitting on the bench and it snapped shut. All these bright buttons were glowing and I thought they looked suspicious, so I tried some to see what secrets he was hiding. But, being the super responsible adult I am, I only tried a few… sort of. The case flipped and flopped and flew around. I was terrified so I tried a big red button to stop it but started shooting lasers instead!
I am truly sorry about all the damage that was made. I promise that it will never happen again.
Sincerest apologies,
Percy Pigeon